If you spend much time on Fetlife or SLS, you know the single guy is an extremely popular part of the “lifestyle”. In my experience, over the past 15 years of being involved in this, I often wondered why the single guy is treated so much differently than anyone else. Have you ever thought the same thing?
Let’s run some quick numbers. On SLS, I went to the “WHO VIEWED ME” section and opened it to show the past 50 profiles that “viewed” us. 50% of them were single guys. Not one was a single lady. And I am willing to venture, the remaining 50% were probably half filled with guys whose spouse doesn’t know they created a profile. 40% of the profiles were created less than 6 months ago. 55% were less than 2 years old.
In my private messages on SLS, I checked out some of these single guy profiles. Nearly all of them said the same thing, “looking for single ladies or couples to see if there is a connection”. They are all professional, athletic, and “discreet”. Almost every profile either did NOT have a picture and the ones that did had at least one DICK PIC. A good percentage of them even have copy and pasted the same message saying, “Hey there, great profile”, etc. numerous times.
Where am I going with this? Great question. We have run swinger’s clubs for the past 15 years and tried our best to be fair to the single guy. Many clubs absolutely do not allow them without a sponsorship of a couple or without coming with a date. We started out that way but loosened that rule to try to facilitate the couples wanting a single guy. And there are a bunch with the increased popularity of the HotWife/Stag & Vixen fantasies. This increases the NEED for the single male, especially younger ones.
Pandagossips.com tells us that another form of the Hotwife fantasy, cuckolding is the second most searched kind of porn. Don’t know what cuckolding is? It’s watching the female significant other get fucked while she and the male doing her both make fun of you and humiliate you. There is a female version of this also. This is where the female watches her male S/O fuck another female while they both humiliate her. She would be a Cuckquean.
I asked some of our Club Iniquity members their thoughts about the single guy and swinging. Each of them replied they have used the single guy for the hotwife fantasy and threesomes. They also said they get a lot of requests from single guys and have hooked up with one (or more) recently. I even chatted with one of our single guys and he said the biggest challenge is couples thinking all single guys are the same. It is difficult to gain the trust of a couple. I have also talked to vanilla people who have no idea I am in the lifestyle. Jealousy, on the part of both the male and female, are a huge hinderance for this kind of thing. It doesn’t have to be your kink. There is no shame in not wanting to share. But, there is also something called compersion (vicarious joy associated with seeing one’s partner have a joyful sexual experience with another) that can be a real turn on when you get to watch your significant other take it hard from another guy.
How does the single lady play into all of this? I would venture to guess that nearly any guy you ask on the street, “hey how about a threesome with your girl and another girl?” They’d be tripping over their own dick trying to make it happen. Is the single guy being treated differently? Are we experiencing a double standard or justifiable action to prevent sausage fests at parties and other lifestyle get togethers?
Is the single guy becoming more of a necessity than a hinderance in the lifestyle. Whether it be cuckolding or Hotwifing or maybe even a simple threesome, value appears to be increasing.
If you are a single guy, here is some advice on what NOT to do. According to Openlove101.com, these are the 5 things to NOT do.
- Don’t come on too strong
- Don’t be the creepy guy
- Don’t be a peeping tom
- Don’t be the “one too many” guy
- And Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there
Don’t do those things and you could be at the other end of someone’s fantasy come true.
What are your thoughts on the subject? How do you feel single guys should be treated in the lifestyle?
Club Iniquity